Ever play that tug-of-war game with your dog where you hold one end of a stick and your pet holds the other end in his mouth? Your dog loves this game and the longer and stronger you hold onto your end, the stronger your dog pulls his end – sometimes even growling as he pulls. …
Calling All Educators, and Parents Too: Food For Thought For When Schools Re-open
Companion piece to “Shall We Fight, or Shall We Solve A Problem?” Remember this longtime definition of insanity? “If after you try something 2 or 3 times and it doesn’t work, you keep on doing it the same way.” Having been a secondary teacher for 25 years and a teacher educator for 10 years, I …
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And you thought you spent a lot of time with your kids before this crisis
You’ve always been spending time with your kids: taking them to their games, to their music lessons, to their tutors, to their friends’ houses, to doctors’ appointments…. You’ve planned and hosted birthday parties, sleepovers, camping, movie nights, marshmallow roasts…. But this is sooo different. You are literally stuck inside with them as you try to …
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Words Matter – a Lot
This month’s blog is a companion to, “Shall We Fight or Shall We Solve a Problem?” Pretend for a minute that you and your adult sister live near each other and often swap clothes. She calls and asks if she can borrow your new sweater. You respond by telling her no because you haven’t worn …
How to Spoil a Child in Less Than 10 Years
We’ve all heard that we shouldn’t give a child everything she wants because this action is a sure way to spoil her. This advice is only partially true. Actually, there are six surefire ways we can create a totally spoiled child. Yes, I did say, “We can create.” The we refers to any of us …
The Kind of Attention Children Need to Become Responsible – Lessons from Head Start
The following 2 stories are from a collection written by my teaching mentor, Marian Burns. Although these stories are from Head Start teaching experiences, they speak to parents as well as to teachers. Julie’s Story Julie was a very attractive and very bright 4-year old. She was also very headstrong and extremely difficult to control. …
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Talking With Our Children
When you’re out and about, try this little experiment: listen to parents talking to their kids. In the grocery store, at the playground, on the train into the city - anywhere I overhear conversations between a parent and child, I notice primarily 2 different types of talking between them. One type of talking goes something …
Our First Child is Going Away to College
Off to college! Wow, the mixture of feelings is overwhelming. With great excitement, we’re helping our daughter buy and pack for that big new life; college. With a sigh of relief and, yes, a little guilt, we recognize that we’re also excited at the new freedom we’ll gain. We’re sad too, for we’ll miss having …
What Does Salem Need?
“You have to let me play, Mom,” begs 10-year-old Salem as she and her mother are getting ready to go to the last game of the season. Her volume now increased to almost yelling, “I don’t care if the doctor said I have to stay off my foot. I’m okay. I can do this.” Her …
To Show Anger or Not to Show Anger
In my last blog, I advised parents against beginning a confrontation with their child or adolescent in anger. Parents ask, “Does that mean I shouldn’t get mad at my child?” Not at all - you’re human, and that means you will most definitely get angry. It’s natural in every relationship to feel angry from time …